The Bumpy Road Has Another Kind of Bump

I will never forget this day as long as I live. I won't forget the agonizing anxiety, the sweet relief, or the extreme excitement.

I went in to the doctor at 7:30 Saturday morning for my HCG blood test. This was THE test. This test would tell me if my levels were high enough to be proclaimed "pregnant" or if we had a heartbreak waiting for us. When I left the doctor, I sat in my car and just cried..I just had to. The mixture of stress and relief was overwhelming. It was over, but hopefully it was just beginning.

Once I contained the cray, I called Brett and asked him on a breakfast date. We went to Brother Juniper's and by the time we left..it was 9:00. Well that only killed an hour of time...so next up "operation how to keep yourself busy while waiting on a phone call that could potentially change your life." We ran a few errands then went to my parent's pool.

I kept checking my phone. Brett kept checking my phone. Then at about 1:30 it rang. I've never moved so fast in my life. I ran to the side of the house with Brett following close behind. "Mrs. Heinrich we have your test results. Your levels were really good and your test came back positive." OMG! I screamed. I started shaking. I gave a "thumbs up" to Brett and after a few more words from the nurse, hung up the phone.

Like I said, I will never forget this day. I'll never forget sobbing into Brett's arms and the moment we shared together. I won't forget my niece Kate's sweet face peeking around the corner to see if we were happy or sad. I'll always remember coming from the side of my parent's house and saying "positive" to my silent, waiting family. I'll never forget hugging my mom and us staining each others shoulders with tears. I'll never forget my sister's elated scream, my brother in law's smile behind the camera, or my dad's watery eyes. (and of course my baby brother Jake's woo hoo from his pool float...and by "baby" I mean 16 year old.) It was just one of those days.

We told our closest friends and family and now I'm telling you: Ice Ice BABY!!!

That's right! We have one little Baby Booheini in there and we are beyond happy. It's still early, I'm just about 7 weeks, but we got to see the teeny tiny heart beating this week..it was so crazy! We want to share early because this little life matters and it's absolutely amazing what God has done. Also, with IVF, and especially blogging about IVF, you kind of have to share early on because people are wondering (and asking lol) "Did it work? Did it work?"

Thank you for praying for this miracle! and please continue to pray that this little sweet pea (literally, because that's what size it is) hangs in there for the long haul.

Looks like a gummy bear. :)

And to my precious people who are still waiting on or who have lost their little one:

Summertime..the Livin's Easy

Ahh sweet summertime! Our summer has consisted of doctor's visits, beach trips, shots, professional developments, meds, football practices, egg retrievals, declutterings, embryo anxiety, boating excursions, and waitin', prayin', and waitin some more. It really was a great 8 weeks (especially since Brett and I are both teachers. :)Here's some highlights:

We started the summer in Perdido Key, FL with the Bousson Bunch. Always so special to get to spend a week with my fun and entertaining family. We are so blessed that my parents have always made vacations an important part of our lives and make it possible to get together out of town at least once a year.

We came back just in time for Italian Fest. We heart festivals at our house.

Fun times in the pool like when Josh and Brett decided to recreate their favorite wrestling moves.

Gulf Shores, AL for the week of the 4th of July with a group of our good friends. 2nd annual for us & so much fun! Some of our friends decided on the trip that we should name a baby "Olaf" since they were "frozen embryos" haha!

I got to hang with Kate, Preston, and Sam.

We celebrated Brett's 29th birthday with our friends at Chiwawa's.

..and then we celebrated mine and Roz's (which are 2 days apart) at Mi Pueblo.

What a fun summer!!

Tomorrow..You're Only A Day Away

Tomorrow is our day! It's time to transfer these sweet Baby BooHeini embryos. We are going to do our two grade A's at the same time. I go in at 10:00 in the morning for blood work/ultrasound and then we head downstairs to the surgery center for the transfer. Amanda, my sister, is going to drive me there and Brett will meet us there coming from his school so he can work in the morning.

It seems like every post I ask for prayers, prayers, prayers, but I'm going to keep asking because they keep working. Writing this blog has been such a blessing..not only because people have had our back the whole way, but also because people who have been or are going through this same journey have reached out to us. We have gotten to see how God's great plan is not always our great plan, and we have been able to see Him work through it all. It's been time-consuming, challenging, physically painful, and emotionally exhausting, but I know it will all be worth it when we get to finally announce that news we've been waiting almost 4 long years to say.

We will be able to find out if the transfer was successful in a few weeks and I'd love to have the opportunity to announce it in a fun, creative way like everyone else. (At least I'll have one sense of normalcy! LOL) So when I know and think the time is right, my loyal "bloggees" (all like 20 of you :) will be some of the first to know. Thank you for sharing this experience with us.

More Waitin' & Brett's Brag Board

Went to the doc today for bloodwork and ultrasound and they called me back and said we needed to wait another week and check everything again. So, I was disappointed and sad but I do want everything to be just right for the embryo transfer. Later today, I was Pinteresting mindlessly and saw this quote:

Joseph waited 13 years.

Abraham waited 25 years.

Moses waited 40 years.

Jesus waited 30 years.

If God is making you wait, you're in good company.

Made me feel better. Okay, now on to the mushy stuff. Yesterday was Brett's birthday and I just have to take a minute and talk about how amazing my husband is. I wanted to share a letter he wrote me a few weeks ago word for word, but he wanted to keep it, in it's entirety, between us. (and sharing the whole thing might be a little too braggadocious..) I think I forgot between the shots, and the meds, and the every-other-day doctor visits, that Brett is going through this right along beside me. Even though he did run out of the room the first time he watched me do an injection..hmmmm..

But anyway, that letter he wrote meant so much to me because it put into words what I wanted and needed to hear in the middle of all this. He told me he was awake at 2:00 in the morning because he was so nervous and excited about the next few weeks. He let me know that he was proud of me and appreciated what I was putting my body (and mind) through to get us to the prospect of a Baby BooHeini. He told me that God drew up our plan long ago and that everything happens for a reason. He said that I handled tough situations with grace and courage, and that he respected me. And finally, he wrote how much he loved me. I was just blown away by his words. For those of you who know Brett, he's not the type to wear his heart on his sleeve, so all his thoughts written out like that meant a lot and I know he would trade places with me if he could.

Ohhh Ellie & Carl....gets me every time.

Trials and tribulations like this can really put a "wear and tear" on a relationship, but they can also show you what you're made of. Granted, right now I may be made of progesterone, but my husband told me I'm brave and strong, and that's all that matters.

"Crisis Averted" (in the words of Brett)

I went to the doctor today for blood work for the first time since the egg retrieval and the nurse called me with my instructions and started with how I'm supposed to go back to doing my Lupron shots, which I still had left from a few weeks ago. Then she begins naming off medicines I didn't have and had never heard of. She said they should have been delivered a week ago..say what?!

So I had to call the pharmacy and get them to overnight the meds by 5:30 (it's 4:00 at this point). I call and of course the girl's on lunch for the next hour, so I leave a message on her voice mail and with her assistant, and then I wait patiently freak out and make sure the volume on my phone is at maximum level, pray, check it 20 times, pray, drink a glass (or 3) of wine to calm the nerves, pray, wait until the hour is up, pray, and call again and.. yes! She answers. I exasperatingly explain what's happened and my life is over if I don't get these meds by tomorrow and my sweet baby angel frozen embryos are counting on being transferred the week of August 4th so I must have this shipment a.s.a.p.!

Well, the pharm rep Andrea' made it happen and I'll have all of it tomorrow. So we're still a go (as of now) for the transfer for the first week of August. Wheeew..I exhaust myself.

Our Embryo Report Card

Total frozen embryo count is 4 and they made their mommy and daddy proud. We have 2 grade A's, 1 grade B, and 1 grade C+. (Hey, I was an A,B,C student and I made out just fine.) So, hallelujah-praise-the-Lord! This part of the waiting game is over. I thought I was literally going to throw up when I saw the embryologist on my caller ID yesterday (Sunday) because I was so nervous. That day she had already frozen the 2 A's and 1 B, and told me she was waiting on the others to see if there would be any more to freeze. She called today (Monday) and said she froze one more and it was a C+. They grade the embryos A-D based on many different facts. Obviously, A's the best then B and so on.

We are thrilled to have 4 embryos to work with. Answered prayers. I say prayerS because we prayed over and over and over and I know many of my prayer people did too. Thank you!!

Now on to the next IVF adventure: the transfer. We are waiting on cycling timing on this and will hopefully be doing the transfer in the next couple of weeks. Also, YAY to not hyperstimulating which was a possibility when I last posted.

I know it's so easy to say "God is good" when things are going good, but let me just say :

Hurry Up & Wait

The egg retrieval was a success. They got 24 eggs (whoa). I got to sleep through the whole process and was just uncomfortable afterwards, not really in any pain. Before the procedure, our doctor came in to talk to us about the chance of me hyper stimulating. With my young age (ha! 28 is young in the IVF world. Good for the self-esteem), large egg count, and high estrogen level, I was a prime candidate for this to happen. He talked with us about freezing all of our embryos and trying the embryo transfer in a few weeks instead of a few days. That way, there would be 0% chance of hyper stimulation and a higher chance that the embryo transfer would be successful.

This was a little disappointing because Brett and I both were expecting to do the transfer within 3-5 days, but after waiting for 4 years for a baby, what's a few more weeks, right? So we decided to go the frozen route.

We just got a call from the embryologist saying out of the 24 eggs, they could use 14. They are watching 7 of the eggs waiting for more maturity, and 7 of the eggs have been fertilized. These little guys (or gals lol) have days more to go to make it, so these next few days will be a game of "hurry up and wait" and prayin', prayin', prayin'.

If I've learned one thing from this experience it's patience. Waiting for God's timing can be frustrating. Sometimes it feels like He doesn't hear you at all. Sometimes you feel almost forgotten.

I love this verse I found randomly one day, and I think it fits with our IVF journey: "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." Romans 12:12. So please keep praying for me, Brett, and our Baby BooHeini embryos, and thank you for everyone who has been constant in prayer for us. It has helped us get this far. Well, the prayers and Muddy's cupcakes..those help too.

Thank you mom for the Plain Jane and Prozac delivery yesterday. #cupcakesheal